lfhb's Blog

It seems like yesterday that I was crying over not being able to get pregnant, and now my oldest is soon to be 15, with my youngest not too much younger..... the years go by far too quickly. But, I have grown to enjoy each year even more than the previous. Growing closer to them even more as they grow nearer to adulthood - I hope this trend continues. I not only love them, but I really LIKE them.... they are simply the coolest people I know. They make me laugh, think deeply, fear a life without them, and challenge my sense of wonder about the universe - so much - too much to put into words.

My oldest is undergoing some neurological issues this month (requiring some invasive testing; not all fun) - and he's been so very brave, even with his autism and cognitive delay, I think he is probably one of the most evolved humans I will ever have the pleasure of knowing. His midnight sermons about the truths of the universe, are among my favorite moments - he loves to sit under the stars and just talk about everything from molecular composition of dust particles to why numbers exist (and his question is always, why? hmmm....why indeed).

His sister is truly an old soul and pillar of truth and kind strength - "Don't take this wrong, mom... I love you and dad... but I love my brother more." What mother wouldn't wrap her arms in sheer painful delight at such an exlamation of love for her special needs brother? My heart felt completely safe in that moment - knowing that my son has such a lioness for a sister - an old soul who refuses to see harm come to her brother. Beauty. Simply Beauty in a profound sense.

My words today are simple and short - but real and from the heart. Goodnight sweet children (around the world / and universe). You are loved and appreciated from this mother who knows what it is to love so deeply that no words could ever come close to its description. "Good"night, indeed.

Just thought I'd share a couple of short lectures on "Brain Stuff" that I have in store for my students.... You will enjoy, I promise.

http://www.ted.com/talks/lang/eng/vilayanur_ramachandran_on_your_mind.html

Brain Lecture Fusiform Gyrus

http://www.ted.com/talks/rebecca_saxe_how_brains_make_moral_judgments.html

Brain Lecture Reading Other Minds

Yes! I will eat this month! Adjunct college professors make diddly squat! That's why we have to take a bazillion "assignments" with  different colleges in order to just make $20K a year.  I love TESC as that is one of the colleges I attended some ten thousand years ago - good school and I'm proud to teach the newbies! I teach at Temple College, University of Phoenix, and now TESC. These teaching gigs pay my rent so I can devote the bulk of my time to the two nonprofits I serve. I love teaching - and have been teaching for about 20 years now - horrible pay in dollars, but great intrinsic satisfaction - HEY! I get paid to continually expand my mind alongside the minds of my students....it's the coolest, really. Ok, enough happiness.... Eighty Joes My Friends...... LFHB

Arrrrrgh! Are there no clinical psych internships that serve the poor?!!!!! It seems to be the case damnit! I want to serve my regular population of folks (that I've served for 20 years) and all the internships that I find are in fancy shmancy clinics and hospitals that pretty much only serve paying or insured folks.... This is complete crap!!!! REAL people do not have money or insurance for mental health services - and damnit they need me and folks like me who will gladly serve them.... But NOOOOOOOOO.... the damn APA and APPIC internship system only accredits clinics that have the bucks to meet certain standards - total BS!!!!! Plenty of nonprofits are perfectly good sites for APA and APPIC acreditation except they don't have the bucks to meet the new stupid APPIC rule "must pay interns a minimum of $21,000" - they don't have that kind of money! Nonprofits don't have money!!!! But they still need practitioners willing to serve!!!! What the hell?!!! Shame on APA / APPIC - they've turned their back on the REAL people who need the most intensive services by not allowing PhD interns serve these nonprofits, just because the nonprofits don't have the "bling" to meet APA / APPIC standards - sickening..... Well.... I'm one of those rule breakers.... and I'm going to serve these nonprofits no matter what. I've been doing it for years and nothing is going to stop me now - if APA/APPIC won't certify my internship hours then they can go fly a kite - I don't need them either (I do...but I'm willing to give them up over this principle). So, THERE!

I'm thinking about someone I haven't seen in over a decade and I'm curious to know if she is alive and well. She's one of those souls who always saw (sees) the good in everyone, no matter the circumstance. I hope she is doing well - wherever she is - her maiden name was Shannon Meyer (Albuquerque, New Mexico) but I have no idea what her name is now or where she lives today - I've tried finding her several times to no avail. Here is to you, Shannon - a sweet person I'll never forget.

LFHB